Saturday, 17 April 2010

Ohhhhh.... Its Been A While...

oops.. i have not wrote this one for a while neither..

but i can say:

It has been 4 weeks and 6 days since the operation, and the removal of MY baby & MY Fallopian tube, and just last night i have now started my period.. this is the first one i have had since December.
I am in bit of pain, but luckily for me i have the pain killers from the operation left still such as the Naproxen & Cocodymols..
I keep getting upset - because i feel different.. and i guess i KNOW that apart of me is missing... but i am struggling to get it out properly, i have not even seen the mental health counciler person i see at my drs surgery in over a month or two, and the next appointment i got was for the 30th, so he doesnt even know what is going on and i have not really got any one to talk to about it so i was going to keep a blog so i could write it out to make me feel in some respects bit better,
but due to some idiots causing problems from them and using bits of the information to cause a row etc. its hardly fair, but i dont know of any other way i can " get out " my emotions or feelings when i have seemed to have lost alot of people over the last month since the operation as people have just not spoke to me or ignored me etc.
I guess i'd kinda like things to go back to the way they used to be, but i know deep deep deep down inside they cant be, because i probably cannot ever have kids... for the many fears that would now replace it..

No comments:

Post a Comment