Sunday, 28 February 2010

The Questions..

i dont understand why i was picked to have this, i mean have i done something terrible to not be able to have my own child!?
i have always wanted to have a baby, but i couldnt because i genuinely felt that i was infertile and unable to have children, till the 12th i get confirmed to be pregnant by my doctor only for 2 weeks later to be told that the pregnancy had to be terminated due to being ectopic!! :(
i read that the chances of the pregnancy being ectopic are very very small about 1% in people..

I have been thinking about how things would be if i had seen my baby on the screen and saw there was a baby growing in my uterus and not elsewhere... and wondering what things would be like! :(

How It Started...

I found out i was pregnant on the 12th Feb.. assumed at first i was in the middle of a miscarriage
as i was bleeding when i got the results back..
Had the first scan on the 15th Feb, found out i was 6w6d but nothing was picked up, so was told it
was miscarriage although unsure.. but was then sent to have blood tests to check my hormone levels..

Had the second scan on the 23rd Feb (8 weeks) and was told again nothing was there, but there could
be something wrong with my left ovary, and was told then that they think it might be growing in my
ovary, and would have to have it removed.. but was sent for futher blood tests to see if anything
but it was then confirmed as ectopic on the 26th after my 3rd Scan (8w 3d) and was then told that i
had to terminate, and there definatly was no chance that the baby could just be earlier than the
8weeks 3days.. as there was no fluid in my uterus.
So, i had the first injection to start the process..

I had really hoped for a child of my own, and in a way i had no idea it would had happened so soon, after thinking that i could not have children.