Tomorrow Marks The Start Of The Blog...

Tomorrow will mark the day that I started this blog. It is sometimes hard to believe that it has been 5 years since I first started this blog. Upsets me because I feel that nothing has changed and still feel that I have no answers to it all.

I am a little emotional because it means that the next couple of weeks are going to be quite hard for me! March has always been a difficult month for me, because my Nan died on the 6th March 1996 so I struggle with that already, and having my Angel day does make it a little hard for me.

Cannot believe that this is going to be the 5th year since all this has happened and still feel no different..

<3 p="">

Babies Everywhere..

I am starting to struggle a little at the moment, everywhere I turn there are people sharing pictures of their newborn babies, or sharing pictures of their own children and also scans because they've not long got pregnant..

Makes doing things quite hard because all I seem to do is wish it was me!!

This life after my ectopic pregnancy hasn't changed, nothing has improved and I am still in the same situation as I was back in 2010 not knowing the outcome of any of this.

It is also quite hard sometimes with my own family.. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my family, but sometimes I look at my sister and wish it was me and I wish it was my turn :( she's due towards the end of March and my mum and my sister have apparently been talking about how nice it would be if her new baby was born on my Angel's Day :( I don't know how to feel about any of this!

What's worse is that my mum talks about is her grandsons and never mentions or remembers mine.

I am going to be thinking about doing something special this year. Because this year my angel would be 5 and getting ready to start school :( it's not fair